I noticed that some of our fans are particularly bad at coping with difficult losses. It seems to me that if tough news and tough losses from your sports teams tends to throw you into a severe state of depression or temporary insanity, then following Rutgers sports is probably not the right hobby for you. Let's all agree that getting angry at your family or going online to scream about everything isn't healthy. Personally, I find the highs during the good times are way greater than the lows during the bad times. How do I do it? Here are my secrets:
1. Accept that it is out of your own control. If they lose, it's not your fault. No one blames you. You are not going to lose your job or your good reputation. Your own reaction is what you control and is what will cause you to gain or lose respect from those around you. Unless you have a big checkbook, no one cares who you want fired/hired/retained - no sense fighting about it. Just let it go and support the players who chose RU when they could have chosen elsewhere.
2. Remember that no one thinks more or less of you based on your rooting interests. You root for these teams because either you went to school at RU or because you support the hometown team, but they are not a reflection of you. Their wins and losses are theirs to live with, and you merely share in their feelings. But the outcome is not a reflection of you to anyone else.
3. Diversify your opportunities for happiness. Unless you gamble on Rutgers sports (don't do that) all it costs you when they lose is a chance at some joy. I try to have as many irons in the fire as possible in this respect. So if you have some good friends or children, take them fishing. Go to the track. Find a new sports bar to try out to go watch some NFL games today.
4. Don't read the newspaper recaps or watch commentary. They are trying to make you feel badly - good for their ratings. Deprive them the opportunity.
5. Distract yourself. One of my favorite things to do when I need a distration is to go through my closet and cull my wardrobe. This not only frees up space in my closet and removes clothing that I no longer feel good wearing, but it also gives me something to donate to a qualified organization which gives me up to a $500 tax deduction. Other distractions include organizing the garage/shed, build shelves, find some yard sales. The possibilities are endless.
6. Rewatch and relive your team's greatest moments. This video summarizing the 2006 RU/Louisville game to music is my go-to video. You probably have your own favorites. Today is a day to view them. You will feel better.
7. Exercise. If you are not healthy enough for strenuous activity, then just go for a walk. If you do exercise regularly, make sure to get your workout in today, and ramp up the intensity a little bit today. If you jog, pick up the pace a bit today. If you lift, then slide on a couple extra pounds because they physical exertion will help you release any lingering stress. If your gym has a cold pool and sauna, make sure to take advantage of those today.
8. Hug. Grab someone in your family and hug them. It feels good. If you do not have anyone in your life to hug, there are actually services you can pay for professional cuddling. There are amazing therapeutic benefits of this.
9. Call a friend or family member who has no interest in football. Today is a good day to talk to people who know nothing about sports. This way you can have a conversation in which the topic will not be raised. You might find you have been so consumed with sports that you have let yourself drift away from people in your life who have no sports interest. Today is a great day to reach out to those people and reconnect with them.
10. Get a head start on your work week. If you are employed and have work that can get done today, do it. Not only will it serve as a distraction (Strategy #5), but imagine your relief tomorrow to come in and find that some of your load was lightened. This will help you get ahead, get a promotion, get a raise leading to more disposable income that you can donate to the program and gain some control over coaching decisions (Strategy #1). Win-Win.
I hope you enjoyed reading these strategies. When Rutgers wins, I do the exact opposite of the above and totally bask in it all as much and as long as possible. Feel free to add your own strategies or comment on these. Thanks, and make it a great day!
1. Accept that it is out of your own control. If they lose, it's not your fault. No one blames you. You are not going to lose your job or your good reputation. Your own reaction is what you control and is what will cause you to gain or lose respect from those around you. Unless you have a big checkbook, no one cares who you want fired/hired/retained - no sense fighting about it. Just let it go and support the players who chose RU when they could have chosen elsewhere.
2. Remember that no one thinks more or less of you based on your rooting interests. You root for these teams because either you went to school at RU or because you support the hometown team, but they are not a reflection of you. Their wins and losses are theirs to live with, and you merely share in their feelings. But the outcome is not a reflection of you to anyone else.
3. Diversify your opportunities for happiness. Unless you gamble on Rutgers sports (don't do that) all it costs you when they lose is a chance at some joy. I try to have as many irons in the fire as possible in this respect. So if you have some good friends or children, take them fishing. Go to the track. Find a new sports bar to try out to go watch some NFL games today.
4. Don't read the newspaper recaps or watch commentary. They are trying to make you feel badly - good for their ratings. Deprive them the opportunity.
5. Distract yourself. One of my favorite things to do when I need a distration is to go through my closet and cull my wardrobe. This not only frees up space in my closet and removes clothing that I no longer feel good wearing, but it also gives me something to donate to a qualified organization which gives me up to a $500 tax deduction. Other distractions include organizing the garage/shed, build shelves, find some yard sales. The possibilities are endless.
6. Rewatch and relive your team's greatest moments. This video summarizing the 2006 RU/Louisville game to music is my go-to video. You probably have your own favorites. Today is a day to view them. You will feel better.
7. Exercise. If you are not healthy enough for strenuous activity, then just go for a walk. If you do exercise regularly, make sure to get your workout in today, and ramp up the intensity a little bit today. If you jog, pick up the pace a bit today. If you lift, then slide on a couple extra pounds because they physical exertion will help you release any lingering stress. If your gym has a cold pool and sauna, make sure to take advantage of those today.
8. Hug. Grab someone in your family and hug them. It feels good. If you do not have anyone in your life to hug, there are actually services you can pay for professional cuddling. There are amazing therapeutic benefits of this.
9. Call a friend or family member who has no interest in football. Today is a good day to talk to people who know nothing about sports. This way you can have a conversation in which the topic will not be raised. You might find you have been so consumed with sports that you have let yourself drift away from people in your life who have no sports interest. Today is a great day to reach out to those people and reconnect with them.
10. Get a head start on your work week. If you are employed and have work that can get done today, do it. Not only will it serve as a distraction (Strategy #5), but imagine your relief tomorrow to come in and find that some of your load was lightened. This will help you get ahead, get a promotion, get a raise leading to more disposable income that you can donate to the program and gain some control over coaching decisions (Strategy #1). Win-Win.
I hope you enjoyed reading these strategies. When Rutgers wins, I do the exact opposite of the above and totally bask in it all as much and as long as possible. Feel free to add your own strategies or comment on these. Thanks, and make it a great day!
