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OT: Anybody work in Consulting?

Rokodesh

Heisman Winner
Aug 30, 2007
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Been looking at moving from a middle-office bank role to a management consulting position, where I would be facing different clients for projects, and be more hands-on in process and project delivery. Had an interview in the city last week, and the job seems great, but I wanted to find out some more stuff that the firm won't always tell you.

How is your work/life balance? (I'm prepared to work long hours and travel so not a problem)

Do you regularly encounter long periods between projects? (my biggest worry)

Do you prefer it over a standard 9-5?

How much vacation do you get?

Any suggestions?
 
Be prepared to ask this question a lot.
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Any any consulting position you live by the mantra: "I bill therefore I am." as soon as your utilization starts dropping start searching for a new position. And just remember you are one VP away from losing your account.
 
Work life balance will depend on the firm and the industry.

Most large firms there is none. You generally fly out Sunday evening and fly back Thursday. Friday is typically a work from home day in a veiled attempt to prevent you from quitting. lol.

Some firms buck this trend, but it's rare on the larger end of the scale.

What level are you going in at? That answer will depend how much you need to worry about your utilization rate within the first 12-18 months.

After 18 months, everyone needs to worry about their utilization rate. If you are going in at a manager (titles are firm dependent) or higher, you'll need to worry about it right off the bat. But most firms are realistic and expect it to take a few months for you to get a reputation inside the firm.

Are you talking about strategy consulting or operations consulting? They have very different dynamics.

Lastly, how old are you? after a certain age, going into the large firms is not a long term proposition. Financially it will make no sense as you'll never work enough years to make partner (or more importantly to pay off buying into the partnership).
 
I ran my own consulting business for 10 years, I always had too much or not enough, but the lulls never seemed to last all that long. It really helps if you have ties to a former company or friends strategically placed that are able to help. I had the former so it was easy to transition, and I had a good deal of work relatively quickly while I built up my client base. Make sure you understand the insurance requirements for those companies you at targeting for business, many of the fortune 1000 have significant liability requirements that require some hefty coverages. ( I often partnered with other firms to work through some of these issues). Also understand how you are going to bill, Corporate America today is generally slow pay with 60-90 days being the norm unless you work out alternative arrangements. Also make sure you set your self up as an LLC it's always nice to have a "shield"
 
Work life balance will depend on the firm and the industry.

Most large firms there is none. You generally fly out Sunday evening and fly back Thursday. Friday is typically a work from home day in a veiled attempt to prevent you from quitting. lol.

Some firms buck this trend, but it's rare on the larger end of the scale.

What level are you going in at? That answer will depend how much you need to worry about your utilization rate within the first 12-18 months.

After 18 months, everyone needs to worry about their utilization rate. If you are going in at a manager (titles are firm dependent) or higher, you'll need to worry about it right off the bat. But most firms are realistic and expect it to take a few months for you to get a reputation inside the firm.

Are you talking about strategy consulting or operations consulting? They have very different dynamics.

Lastly, how old are you? after a certain age, going into the large firms is not a long term proposition. Financially it will make no sense as you'll never work enough years to make partner (or more importantly to pay off buying into the partnership).

-seems like every firm calls it something different, but it would be the associate level (speaking in bank terms)
-The roles i've been interviewing at are operational/risk types of consulting positions.
-just turned 29 last week
 
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-seems like every firm calls it something different, but it would be the associate level (speaking in bank terms)
-The roles i've been interviewing at are operational/risk types of consulting positions.
-just turned 29 last week

So you are a MBA or are going in as an experienced hire?

You are young enough to make my last point above irrelevant.

operations consultants are usually very busy and unless you get lucky and get assigned to clients near your home, will involve 80+% travel. Being in NJ, we can get "lucky" if your operations/risk is in the financial services industry. Most of those firms are still located "here."

If you are manufacturing or supply chain, forget about it. Better get yourself some durable luggage. lol
 
So you are an MBA or are going in as an experienced hire?

You are young enough to make my last point above irrelevant.

operations consultants are usually very busy and unless you get lucky and get assigned to clients near your home, will involve 80+% travel. Being in NJ, we can get "lucky" if your operations/risk is in the financial services industry. Most of those firms are still located "here."

If you are manufacturing or supply chain, forget about it. Better get yourself some durable luggage. lol

Experienced hire. They did tell me a lot of the clients are based in NYC, so that's a positive.

I've spoken to some other companies that said they would put me in an apartment in Toronto/Boston/Etc for 6-9 months if that's where i'd be reporting to.
 
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Been looking at moving from a middle-office bank role to a management consulting position, where I would be facing different clients for projects, and be more hands-on in process and project delivery. Had an interview in the city last week, and the job seems great, but I wanted to find out some more stuff that the firm won't always tell you.

How is your work/life balance? (I'm prepared to work long hours and travel so not a problem)

Do you regularly encounter long periods between projects? (my biggest worry)

Do you prefer it over a standard 9-5?

How much vacation do you get?

Any suggestions?
I've never done it but everyone I know who does hates their life and wants to jump off a bridge.
 
I've never done it but everyone I know who does hates their life and wants to jump off a bridge.

to each their own I guess.

I'd rather have a purpose and the ability to move up based on merit, than continue working a typical 9-5 and not move up much at all. Doing the same thing every day makes me want to jump off a bridge
 
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to each their own I guess.

I'd rather have a purpose and the ability to move up based on merit, than continue working a typical 9-5 and not move up much at all. Doing the same thing every day makes me want to jump off a bridge
Perfectly understandable. If you can get a job that keeps you in NYC most of the time I think you have a big advantage over a lot of folks. The travel in particular can just destroy people's lives.
 
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Rokodesh,

I have an analytics firm and specialize in marketing and risk analytics in the Financial Services space. Here is the issue in analytics - The price people pay per project is great, unfortunately the work can be very up and down. 99% of all of the smaller firms have dried up because of this.

The way we survive is we have a number of products that we have developed and have the requisite recurring revenue to support us in between "elephant" projects. So, if utilization rate is important then you may have some issues because risk analytics typically supports boring operational crap with some exciting stuff thrown in once in awhile. Additionally, while working in a bank as an analyst, you have a ton of knowledge about your data/processes. Every assignment will be a new adventure and your success will be a function of how well some idiot IT guy is in getting you the correct data in the correct format, time period, etc. or how well you can make change in risk management systems. A huge issue we deal with is data cleanliness. A huge issue our clients deal with is IT support to affect change.

If you would like to talk in detail, send me a message with your contact info. I would be more than glad to give you insight about the company/industry if I can help. With the negatives above, it is a great industry under certain conditions.
 
Perfectly understandable. If you can get a job that keeps you in NYC most of the time I think you have a big advantage over a lot of folks. The travel in particular can just destroy people's lives.

I can understand that. From the companies I've spoken to it seems like a reasonable amount of travel for the roles I'm looking at. Lucky to be close to nyc where the big firms are located
 
If you're not concerned with the travel and hours, then you'll be fine. Research each firm you want to apply to...down to the different practices/groups. Some are sweatshops, others are more reasonable. My group is a M-TH travel schedule, Friday's WFH, but other groups are Sunday night to thurs evening, if not travel home two weekends a month only. Pay is ok, benefits are ok. Utilization rates rule supreme. If you're a superstar on your projects, but don't have a stellar utilization rate, forget about getting promoted.
 
Rokodesh,

I have an analytics firm and specialize in marketing and risk analytics in the Financial Services space. Here is the issue in analytics - The price people pay per project is great, unfortunately the work can be very up and down. 99% of all of the smaller firms have dried up because of this.

The way we survive is we have a number of products that we have developed and have the requisite recurring revenue to support us in between "elephant" projects. So, if utilization rate is important then you may have some issues because risk analytics typically supports boring operational crap with some exciting stuff thrown in once in awhile. Additionally, while working in a bank as an analyst, you have a ton of knowledge about your data/processes. Every assignment will be a new adventure and your success will be a function of how well some idiot IT guy is in getting you the correct data in the correct format, time period, etc. or how well you can make change in risk management systems. A huge issue we deal with is data cleanliness. A huge issue our clients deal with is IT support to affect change.

If you would like to talk in detail, send me a message with your contact info. I would be more than glad to give you insight about the company/industry if I can help. With the negatives above, it is a great industry under certain conditions.

sure,

my email is rkodesh1@gmail.com, I'm very interested to learn more. Thanks

-Roman
 
Most of what everyone has said is accurate. Utilization is everything. When I first started in consulting it wasn't unusual for firms to have deep benches and to be able to sit around for months between assignments, watching cartoons and being a general layabout and collecting a paycheck. Those days are gone. You have to hustle your own work, you have to build your own reputation not just with customers but internal to the organization. Find a niche and become the guy they always call when they need help in that particular area.

Our travel week is Monday - Thursday. Marriott has the best hotel bars and restaurants, with Hilton a reasonably close second. Avoid staying at the budget properties - they often don't have bars, the food sucks and they're filled with lonely road warrior guys on tight budgets. The marquis properties are generally filled with pharma reps who tend to get naked after a few shots of tequila.
 
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Spent 5 years as consultant at one of the world's biggest consulting firms doing transactions (M&A, re-org, post-merger integration). A lot depends on the nature of the projects - short-term (1-3 weeks) or long-term (1 month+). Short-term projects are vastly unpredictable and you may need to travel on a minute's notice. Long-term projects typically are Sunday night/Monday morning travel for 4 solid days at client and travel back Thursday night. Exhausting and not great for family (your biggest thrill will be accumulating points at airlines, hotels, etc.). You advance in these firms by having a lot of billable hours and selling add-on services and, as others have pointed out, personal utilization %'s are critical. Depending on your specialty, you could also be prone to cutbacks in a bad economy as well because many types of consulting get slashed during bad times.

The biggest benefit will be exposure to new companies, industries, and important people, and your job should be more interesting. Your best next job could come from a client so always keep your contacts and resume up to date, and always look to build your skills.
 
Follow up question... For someone graduating in the spring of 2017 (Will be 22), How hard/easy is it to break into the consulting industry. I am an Entrepreneurship Major (Small Business Management Focused) with a Finance minor. Have 4 internships looking to add a 5th in the Spring before graduating. Any insight?
 
Follow up question... For someone graduating in the spring of 2017 (Will be 22), How hard/easy is it to break into the consulting industry. I am an Entrepreneurship Major (Small Business Management Focused) with a Finance minor. Have 4 internships looking to add a 5th in the Spring before graduating. Any insight?

Don't go into consulting as a new graduate - you're not a value-add. Any firm that hires you is going to be looking to use you as cannon fodder. Expendable cannon fodder.

Go into private industry, get some experience, learn the ways of the force and then move into consulting. By definition, consulting leadership requires that you know how things actually get done.
 
Don't go into consulting as a new graduate - you're not a value-add. Any firm that hires you is going to be looking to use you as cannon fodder. Expendable cannon fodder.

Go into private industry, get some experience, learn the ways of the force and then move into consulting. By definition, consulting leadership requires that you know how things actually get done.
Don't totally agree. The big prestigious firms will work you hard, pay you well, give you great experience, teach you a ton and put a sterling name on a resume. If its McKinsey, Bain, BCG, PwC, Deloitte, Accenture, etc. they are great places to start a career. At 22, you're supposed to work hard.

If its a lower-tier firm or specifically a workout firm, I would avoid out of college. They will chew you up and spit you out. IMO, its better to start big and go smaller later on as you specialize. If you start small, you can't always get to the big firm from there.
 
Don't totally agree. The big prestigious firms will work you hard, pay you well, give you great experience, teach you a ton and put a sterling name on a resume. If its McKinsey, Bain, BCG, PwC, Deloitte, Accenture, etc. they are great places to start a career. At 22, you're supposed to work hard.

If its a lower-tier firm or specifically a workout firm, I would avoid out of college. They will chew you up and spit you out. IMO, its better to start big and go smaller later on as you specialize. If you start small, you can't always get to the big firm from there.

We can agree to disagree. In my opinion, consulting is something you do after you've accumulated enough subject matter expertise such that it lends a level of gravitas to the input you provide to customers. You don't learn these things from starting your career at a consulting firm.

The chain of ascendency in many business sectors tells a fairly regimented tale of private industry experience followed by successfully parlaying that experience into a lucrative consulting career.
 
Consulting while you are young gets you into a better grad school. Consulting while you are old gets you paid.
 
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We can agree to disagree. In my opinion, consulting is something you do after you've accumulated enough subject matter expertise such that it lends a level of gravitas to the input you provide to customers. You don't learn these things from starting your career at a consulting firm.

The chain of ascendency in many business sectors tells a fairly regimented tale of private industry experience followed by successfully parlaying that experience into a lucrative consulting career.

I have interned for two different companies, one being the tool Manufacturing company Stanley Black & Decker at their world HQ in their Finance Department, Indirect Procurement Department and HR (Mini Leadership Rotation & all separate internships). Also had an internship tracking inventory and tracking orders at a high level at another internship. Looking at different options post graduation.
 
Follow up question... For someone graduating in the spring of 2017 (Will be 22), How hard/easy is it to break into the consulting industry. I am an Entrepreneurship Major (Small Business Management Focused) with a Finance minor. Have 4 internships looking to add a 5th in the Spring before graduating. Any insight?

Don't have much insight into the top tier consulting firms outside of the BIG4, but if you're looking to land something at PWC or Deloitte it isn't that difficult to break into the industry. If you have a good GPA, internship experience and extra curricular activities you can definitely land something out of college. Make sure you hit the job fairs hard and make your face known during your last year.
 
Don't have much insight into the top tier consulting firms outside of the BIG4, but if you're looking to land something at PWC or Deloitte it isn't that difficult to break into the industry. If you have a good GPA, internship experience and extra curricular activities you can definitely land something out of college. Make sure you hit the job fairs hard and make your face known during your last year.

Definitely have Internship Experience and Extra curricular activities include playing football for the school and 2 years as president of my fraternity which include receiving our charter.
 
Work life balance will depend on the firm and the industry.

Most large firms there is none. You generally fly out Sunday evening and fly back Thursday. Friday is typically a work from home day in a veiled attempt to prevent you from quitting. lol.

Some firms buck this trend, but it's rare on the larger end of the scale.

What level are you going in at? That answer will depend how much you need to worry about your utilization rate within the first 12-18 months.

After 18 months, everyone needs to worry about their utilization rate. If you are going in at a manager (titles are firm dependent) or higher, you'll need to worry about it right off the bat. But most firms are realistic and expect it to take a few months for you to get a reputation inside the firm.

Are you talking about strategy consulting or operations consulting? They have very different dynamics.

Lastly, how old are you? after a certain age, going into the large firms is not a long term proposition. Financially it will make no sense as you'll never work enough years to make partner (or more importantly to pay off buying into the partnership).
This is very accurate. There is no work life balance at the big consulting companies. Smaller one may have a better balance, but the smaller you go, the more you are susceptible to the ups and downs of whatever market you are supporting. As the saying goes, when times are good, consultants are the first ones hired and when times are bad, they are the first ones fired.
 
to each their own I guess.

I'd rather have a purpose and the ability to move up based on merit, than continue working a typical 9-5 and not move up much at all. Doing the same thing every day makes me want to jump off a bridge
It seems like you may trade one extreme for another extreme. It may be a perfect fit, but doing consulting will crowd out the other aspects of your life - married, kids, family? Just things to consider.
 
Consulting while you are young gets you into a better grad school. Consulting while you are old gets you paid.
Another saying - consulting is a great place to start your career and a great place to end it. As in, you learn a lot at a young age, go in-house, and then return to consulting later in your career as a senior team member and leverage your knowledge and contacts.
 
Here is one for my fellow consultants:


A shepherd was herding his flock in a remote pasture when suddenly a brand-new BMW drove up. The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and Versace tie, leans out the window and asks the shepherd, "If I tell you exactly how many sheep you have in your flock, will you give me one?"


The shepherd looks at the man and answers, "Sure, Why not?"


The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it to his AT&T cell phone. He surfs to a NASA page on the internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite navigation system to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.


The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe PhotoShop and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany. Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image has been processed and the data stored.


He then accesses a MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with hundreds of complex formulas. He uploads all of this data via an email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response. Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet printer and finally turns to the shepherd and says, "You have exactly 1586 sheep."


"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my sheep." says the shepherd. He watches the young man select one of the animals and stuff it into the trunk of his car.


Then the shepherd says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my sheep?"


The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?" "You're a consultant." says the shepherd.


"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"


"No guessing required." answered the shepherd.


"You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew; to a question I never asked; and you don't know shit about my business. Now give me back my dog."
 
Here is one for my fellow consultants:


A shepherd was herding his flock in a remote pasture when suddenly a brand-new BMW drove up. The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and Versace tie, leans out the window and asks the shepherd, "If I tell you exactly how many sheep you have in your flock, will you give me one?"


The shepherd looks at the man and answers, "Sure, Why not?"


The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it to his AT&T cell phone. He surfs to a NASA page on the internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite navigation system to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.


The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe PhotoShop and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany. Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image has been processed and the data stored.


He then accesses a MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with hundreds of complex formulas. He uploads all of this data via an email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response. Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet printer and finally turns to the shepherd and says, "You have exactly 1586 sheep."


"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my sheep." says the shepherd. He watches the young man select one of the animals and stuff it into the trunk of his car.


Then the shepherd says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my sheep?"


The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?" "You're a consultant." says the shepherd.


"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"


"No guessing required." answered the shepherd.


"You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew; to a question I never asked; and you don't know shit about my business. Now give me back my dog."


I got onto an elevator a bunch of years ago in one of the big bank buildings. There was a guy on the elevator. He reached into his jacket pocket for something and in pulling out whatever he was reaching for he also caught hold of a box of wooden matches. The box opened and as it fell to the floor the matches spilled out.

I looked at the pile of matches scattered across the floor and said "Seventeen".

He looked at me, bent down, scooped up the matches and started counting them. When he got to the last - number seventeen - he looked at me and said, "Wow. That's really f*cked up."
 
I have interned for two different companies, one being the tool Manufacturing company Stanley Black & Decker at their world HQ in their Finance Department, Indirect Procurement Department and HR (Mini Leadership Rotation & all separate internships). Also had an internship tracking inventory and tracking orders at a high level at another internship. Looking at different options post graduation.


Having been in consulting since 1994 it ALL depends on who you work for. IF you can get into a top tier firm do it without hesitation. At 22 work is life except for a few weeks of vacation time. As you move up the ladder (consulting or at a company) life will settle down if you want it to. Having more skills and more experience only gives you more flexibility, not less, in determining how you want to live your life once you get into the family stage of life in your 30's & 40's.

Small caveat, if you have an opportunity to get into a top management training program at a private employer (I'm not sure who is considered top anymore - they were P&G, Ford, GE back in my day) do it. Those are rare opportunities that should not be passed up to work for Deloitte, PwC or similar firms. They will hire you in a minute after you leave P&G, Ford, GE, etc......
 
Work life balance will depend on the firm and the industry.

Most large firms there is none. You generally fly out Sunday evening and fly back Thursday. Friday is typically a work from home day in a veiled attempt to prevent you from quitting. lol.

Some firms buck this trend, but it's rare on the larger end of the scale.

What level are you going in at? That answer will depend how much you need to worry about your utilization rate within the first 12-18 months.

After 18 months, everyone needs to worry about their utilization rate. If you are going in at a manager (titles are firm dependent) or higher, you'll need to worry about it right off the bat. But most firms are realistic and expect it to take a few months for you to get a reputation inside the firm.

Are you talking about strategy consulting or operations consulting? They have very different dynamics.

Lastly, how old are you? after a certain age, going into the large firms is not a long term proposition. Financially it will make no sense as you'll never work enough years to make partner (or more importantly to pay off buying into the partnership).

LOL - so right about this statement.
 
I worked in startegy/analytics consulting for 10 year just leaving last year. Here are my thoughts
-make sure you OK with travel/work overtaking your life and being constantly exhausted. imagine getting up at 3am every Monday, getting to the client by 9AM, Thrusdays involve crazy flight delays and often I wouldn't get home until midnight due to flight delays (this got better when I moved away from Newark)
-what level will you be entering. are you expected to sell projects? if so, this is typically a tough transition

Do you regularly encounter long periods between projects? (my biggest worry)
I was on the bench for 3 months when I first started. Youll get to the point where you will enjoy time on the bench so you can actually breath

Do you prefer it over a standard 9-5?
No! Transiting to a normal 9-5 job has been life changing in a good way. I actually have a life now and can spend more time with my family.


How much vacation do you get?
I got 25 days and only get 15 days with my new job. The trade down was well worth it

Any suggestions?
Im painting a pretty bleak picture here but this is from the perspective from someone who worked in consulting for a long time and was pretty burned out, just make sure you realize that the life is not that glorious. The positive is youll get really good experience and I had a ton of offers when I was looking to go to the client side.
 
-seems like every firm calls it something different, but it would be the associate level (speaking in bank terms)
-The roles i've been interviewing at are operational/risk types of consulting positions.
-just turned 29 last week

Rokodesh - if you have enterprise risk management and operational risk management experience in the financial services industry, then why not interview with the Tier 1 banks? They are always looking for risk management talent. Many of the large banks/financial institutions have PMOs as well - if you have prior project management experience. Go work for one of these companies and you will not have to worry about utilization, living out of suitcase, etc.
 
Rokodesh - if you have enterprise risk management and operational risk management experience in the financial services industry, then why not interview with the Tier 1 banks? They are always looking for risk management talent. Many of the large banks/financial institutions have PMOs as well - if you have prior project management experience. Go work for one of these companies and you will not have to worry about utilization, living out of suitcase, etc.

been doing that as well. However, want the broad exposure and growth potential down the road that consulting could give me. I do like the challenge and ability to work on different projects that this would give me.
 
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One thing you might want to consider with your approach..

Upper tier strategy consulting (think McKinsey, Bain, BCG, and MAYBE Deloitte among the big names) give you exit opportunities into the C Suite.

Exit opportunities for risk and operations management consultants will land you in the upper tier of middle management--which doesn't seem all that far off from what you are tracking now.

At your age, if might be worthwhile to do for 2-3 years to expand your toolkit and to network. But you have to go into it planning your exit from day 1. That sound crazy, but it's the only way to justify the shitty work life balance. If your ultimate goal is to land in upper middle management in a Tier 1 bank, and you can land an opportunity that tracks that now, I would do that.

Consulting life sucks at 90+% of firms. They offset the suck with money, vacation days and stupid office gimmicks like ice cream socials and roving beer carts on Thursday afternoon.

Before you make another decision, map out where you want to be 3 years from now and honestly assess which route gets you there and at what cost personally.

Just my .02

Lastly, if you happen to be bitten by the consulting bug, a MBA or other advanced degree, becomes a necessity from progressing in the firm--right, wrong or indifferent. You will find very few partners or senior managers (or equivalent title) at any white shoe consultancy without an advanced degree. So, factor that into your road map as well.
 
If it requires a lot of travel wouldn't it be more advantageous for someone around my age (22) to be going into a field like that? Since im young I should be more apt to travelling constantly.
 
Here is one for my fellow consultants:


A shepherd was herding his flock in a remote pasture when suddenly a brand-new BMW drove up. The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and Versace tie, leans out the window and asks the shepherd, "If I tell you exactly how many sheep you have in your flock, will you give me one?"


The shepherd looks at the man and answers, "Sure, Why not?"


The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it to his AT&T cell phone. He surfs to a NASA page on the internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite navigation system to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.


The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe PhotoShop and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany. Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image has been processed and the data stored.


He then accesses a MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with hundreds of complex formulas. He uploads all of this data via an email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response. Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet printer and finally turns to the shepherd and says, "You have exactly 1586 sheep."


"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my sheep." says the shepherd. He watches the young man select one of the animals and stuff it into the trunk of his car.


Then the shepherd says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my sheep?"


The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?" "You're a consultant." says the shepherd.


"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"


"No guessing required." answered the shepherd.


"You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew; to a question I never asked; and you don't know shit about my business. Now give me back my dog."
Even though I knew where it was going in general, you got me with "give me back my dog" which I didn't expect. LOL
 
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