OT:Private Schools, Are they worth the cost?

[rutgersdave]

If your kids are going to private schools, what are the cost and is it worth it? Pre-school, K-8th grade or high school. If you have limited resources, which would you consider most important, pre-school, k-8, or HS please rank.

I would assume after all the private school, you would expect a highly rated private school or a Va or Michigan type school.

 

[Scarlet_Scourge]

limited resources?

then move to a place with top ranked blue ribbon public schools.

 

[FanuSanu52]

Yeah, the limited resources bit really squashes any debate.

 

[RU4Real]

It's not necessary to send kids to private elementary schools.

We made the choice to send the girls to private (parochial) high school. It was a definite win.

 

[CuredbywinningRU]

I have a lot of experience with this decision - like all major family/fiscal decisions this is a tough one and there are a number of data points to look at and you need a bit of a filter in looking at them to understand how some stats may be misleading (ie, college placement data). I have kids in private school now including one in the college app process (rising senior) and I'd be happy to share my thoughts and mode of analysis. If you would like to chat send me your email and I will send you my phone #.

 

[derleider]

If your kids are going to private schools, what are the cost and is it worth it? Pre-school, K-8th grade or high school. If you have limited resources, which would you consider most important, pre-school, k-8, or HS please rank.

I would assume after all the private school, you would expect a highly rated private school or a Va or Michigan type school.

Nope. Save the money and hand it to your kid wen they graduate college. Hundreds of thousands of dollars would be a pretty sweet nest egg for them and go about as far as the extra connections they would get from private school.

Unless you live in a really bad neighborhood. Then it would be worthwhile to not have to deal with potential bad influences on so regular a basis.

 

[RUtix4me]

Nope, bought is a great school district, using money for college.

 

[RUMBA-JK]

Huge factor would be the kid(s) - are they super smart? do they have special needs? do they thrive in large groups? or do they excel in more intimate settings with more one-on-one instruction.
Some very highly rated school districts can be great at providing a range of special services for special needs kids - and they have tons of opportunities for the brilliant & extraordinarily gifted - but sometimes they end up just 'processing' the kids in the middle. You need to learn about the strengths & weaknesses of your local school district - what are the chances that your kid will fall through the cracks ?

 

[T2Kplus10]

If you have the resources, a good private school trumps any public school hands down. You get what you pay for - more individual attention, higher quality staff, more control of school policy/dynamics, etc. At a private school, you are a customer, in public school, you are just a number and normally along for the ride.

 

[knightfan7]

Both kids went to public schools thru 8th grade. Son went to a private, daughter public. Daughter was dead set against going anywhere but the local HS so we didn't force the issue. They did the same with college, son private, daughter state school. Both did just fine so in retrospect it worked out.

I believe at the time (2000-04) the private HS was about $8k a year.

 

[RobertG]

It really depends on the area you live in and the private and public school options. In eastern Monmouth county the public school options, including vocational schools, are a better option for the price and the private schools in the area don't impress me.

 

[RUfinal4]

for the private schools you are looking at please do your home work.

While I have not gone to privates I have teachers in my family that started in private schools before switching to publics because of the benefits.

If the private school you are looking at has a lot of teachers with less than 4 years of experience then it may be a feeder school to the publics where they have staff turnover. Also, does the school require teachers to have a teaching degree? On the other end you may get more energy from younger teachers who are more willing to communicate via email regularly with parents where tenured public school teachers may be less willing to do this after school hours.

 

[T2Kplus10]

Huge factor would be the kid(s) - are they super smart? do they have special needs? do they thrive in large groups? or do they excel in more intimate settings with more one-on-one instruction.
Some very highly rated school districts can be great at providing a range of special services for special needs kids - and they have tons of opportunities for the brilliant & extraordinarily gifted - but sometimes they end up just 'processing' the kids in the middle. You need to learn about the strengths & weaknesses of your local school district - what are the chances that your kid will fall through the cracks ?

This hits the nail on the head. High-end public schools are great for special needs children and those that are truly gifted. The middle 80% or so are just along for the ride and this trend is getting worse, not better.

 

[RC1978]

It really depends on the area you live in and the private and public school options. In eastern Monmouth county the public school options, including vocational schools, are a better option for the price and the private schools in the area don't impress me.

Agree with the first part of your post about the options iin Monmouth County with their vocational schools. Do not agree with your second part

Go take a look at the schools RBC and CBA send their kids to. Even most of the Voc. cannot compete

As for the OP question. Depends, how good or bad is your public HS? Easy enought to look up their numbers on a state website. Unless the K-8 is really bad it is probably not worth it. But HS is where a lot of parents decide to go private.

 

[RutgersUnion]

In my neighborhood children start tutoring at 1 - 2 years old to prepare for preschool entrance exams. Parents actually plan out what month their children are born in order to gain a competitive advantage ( one of the highest rates of ivf in the country ).
All that said we have our first on the way and are seriously considering moving.

 

[KnightHound]

There's obviously advantages at top notch private schools that most public schools can't match. However, unless your school district is a complete mess, most public schools prepare kids quite well for college.
I my opnion parental involvement is key to your kids academic success.
My neighbor's son was doing ok at our local HS but his parents felt he would do "better" at a private school, so off to St Joe's Metuchen he went. Well they kind of checked out of his life because they thought the school would handle everything. So get got into drugs barely graduated and went to county college for a year and then dropped out. So even though he went to a good school because his parents weren't involved it was a waste.
Stay involved in you child's education and they will do quite well no matter where they go.

 

[RU85inFla]

I wouldn't send your kids to private school but travel sports teams are definitely where you need to be spending. If your kids isn;t on 3-4 of them they are a complete failure.

 

[Knight Shift]

Opinions are all over the place on this thread, and they are just that---one person's opinion on their OWN situation. Do what YOU think is right for YOUR kid. We live in Rumson. We moved there for the schools. When our oldest son was at the end of 5th grade, we were told that he was so far ahead in math, he was going to be in a math class by himself in 6th grade. We opted to put him and his younger brother in a private school, Oak Hill Academy, which has excellent math and science curricula. The school prides itself on competing and winning math and science competitions. We (parents and kids) have been thrilled with Oak Hill Academy. Our oldest son is going to Biotechnology High School next year. Our youngest son is in 6th grade and loves Oak Hill Academy. It is nice to be surrounded by other kids who love and excel at math and science. But this is not the right environment for every kid.

I can't understand many of the blanket statements above about "save your money" and give it to the kid, or the vocational schools cannot compete with RBC and CBA? Do what you think is right for YOUR kid. Every situation is unique. We feel we made the right choice for our kids and the money was well spent. We considered and discussed private high schools with our oldest son, and he really wanted to go to Biotechnology High School.

 

[Knight Shift]

I wouldn't send your kids to private school but travel sports teams are definitely where you need to be spending. If your kids isn;t on 3-4 of them they are a complete failure.

This is something I can agree with. And if they become 4 or 5 star athletes in high school, encourage them to take multiple visits to Rutgers, and then select another school.:flush:

 

[Caliknight]

Having went to a private high school, I think they are all important. However, after seeing my niece and nephews go to an extraordinary private elementary school, I would probably go with that. These kids are way advanced, learning habits and techniques that will carry them through a lifetime.

High school was great, mostly for the friendships made and the kids I rubbed elbows with. I still see many to this day, and almost are highly, highly successful. Being around successful people is a major plus when I consider private schools.

I would mortgage my house to send my kid to private school if I had to.

 

[vkj91]

My kids go to catholic grammar school and we love it. I know it's kind of taboo on this board but we also like the religious aspect of the school. Not to mention, the discipline is much more strict than in the local public schools.

 

[mildone]

From my observations, if you take a child and send that child to good public schools, that child will have the opportunity to learn exactly the same academics as if you send them to the best private school available. However, if the child attends good private schools, the child will be ensconced in an environment that will help the child gain the mindset and confidence to become a CEO or successful entrepreneur.

It's not so much the academics that matter, is what I'm saying. It's the environment. Obviously children who go to public schools become CEOs and so forth. But, IMO, it's harder for them to rise above the lower expectations they will be surrounded by.

All these opinions you've received here are fine. But I'd recommend doing the research and seeing what the statistics tell you about all this. Then you can weigh that data against all the anecdotal evidence and opinions you've received.

 

[RUsojo]

Yes and no.

 

[Rhuarc]

I think one factor that is very important to determining an educational path is the age of your child. If you're in a great school district, then I would question what advantage going to a private kindergarten, 1st or 2nd grade program would give them. As they mature and begin to identify their interests, you can look at schools that fit their interests and needs. Many public school districts are starting to develop their own STEM programs to meet the advanced and above average students needs.

Whoever said previously, that the parents are the key to success for your children's education was exactly right, IMO. As a teacher, my most successful students are the ones that have parents who interact, support and help their own children on a regular basis.

 

[e5fdny]

It really depends on the area you live in and the private and public school options. * In eastern Monmouth county the public school options, including vocational schools, are a better option for the price and the private schools in the area don't impress me.[/QUOTE]

Agree with the first part of your post about the options in Monmouth County with their vocational schools. Do not agree with your second part.

+ Go take a look at the schools RBC and CBA send their kids to. Even most of the Voc. cannot compete.

As for the OP question. Depends, how good or bad is your public HS? Easy enought to look up their numbers on a state website. Unless the K-8 is really bad it is probably not worth it. But HS is where a lot of parents decide to go private.

* IMO you could say that about some of them in Western Monmouth too. Not all but some. And there is only one in Eastern Monmouth I like.

+ Having family go thru both with some in there now I was not as impressed as I thought I would be with were a lot were going, considering the $$$.

But will say I was impressed with where the kids from Biotech, HiTech and Allied Health are going. WOW. And quite a few are headed to the Banks.

The flip side to those schools though (which is not important to every parent or kid) is they are only one side of the menu...no sports, not too many real extracurricular stuff. If you want to do those kind of things you have to do it your local HS. Not a problem if you live close, but not every kid does.

And a BIG +1 on the parental involvement thing.

 

[RUJohnny99]

Agree with the first part of your post about the options iin Monmouth County with their vocational schools. Do not agree with your second part

Go take a look at the schools RBC and CBA send their kids to. Even most of the Voc. cannot compete

20% of CBA graduates go to Rutgers or Penn State. 6 out of 220 went Ivy League (no Harvard, Yale, or Princeton). Roughly about the same as your typical public Monmouth County High School.

http://www.cbalincroftnj.org/uploaded/guidance/US_News_Report_class_of_2014.pdf

Ranney School makes public where their graduates go to college. It's an impressive list, but for $30,500/year, I would expect nothing less.

https://cdn.media910.whipplehill.net/ftpimages/337/misc/misc_122465.pdf

Imagine being the parents of the one kid who went to Stockton after you just dropped $122,000 on high school.

 

[Dr. Potato]

Parents tell me all the time how their kid goes to a "good" public school. It's funny because everyone knows anything run by the government is a mess. So what they do now is take the top ten to twenty percent of kids and separate them out into different programs. And tell the parents they are in a "special" program.

Is a degree from a top 100 University the same as a degree from one in the 200's?

 

[Upstream]

If you have the resources, a good private school trumps any public school hands down. You get what you pay for - more individual attention, higher quality staff, more control of school policy/dynamics, etc. At a private school, you are a customer, in public school, you are just a number and normally along for the ride.

Why would private schools have higher quality staff? Teacher salaries in private schools in NJ are typically a fraction of what public school teachers make.

 

[vascosg]

Biotech and the vocationals hurt the publics because it drained the very top talent. At the same time, the publics have lowered the requirements for Honors for more inclusion. Many publics no longer excel at the high end as they once did.

 

[RUtix4me]

Looked at the power 3 (DB, BC, SJU) in bergen cty, the teachers did not impress me, the lord of the flys mentality was evident, and it was Football first, are you an athelete for sure. Kids got a first rate top 10 NJ public school education paid for by my property taxes, all went to Top 50 National Universities....and got to play high school sports. Only 2% of high school atheletes go on to play in college, and most quit quite quickly in olympic sports once they realize the return on their time isn't worth it.

Public schools in the right district are great. One has to realiz that top universities will take 1-3 kids per school tops, so not sure Bergen Academies does anything to propel one to a better school. That said, not knock the Academies either...its free if you qualify.

 

[Local Shill]

With how expensive it is to live here, I'm absolutely amazed that any regular people can afford private schools. Essentially, you're paying twice since probably 2/3 of your property taxes go to the schools.

How do you guys afford to pay for private schools on top of a mortgage, property taxes, utilities, food, car insurance, health insurance AND still save for your kids' college AND your retirement AND have some left for a vacation/eating out/other entertainment?

You all must be rolling in the cash if you're spending 5, 10, 15K a year extra for private schools. I tip my hat to you.

 

[Local Shill]

Having went to a private high school, I think they are all important. However, after seeing my niece and nephews go to an extraordinary private elementary school, I would probably go with that. These kids are way advanced, learning habits and techniques that will carry them through a lifetime.

High school was great, mostly for the friendships made and the kids I rubbed elbows with. I still see many to this day, and almost are highly, highly successful. Being around successful people is a major plus when I consider private schools.

I would mortgage my house to send my kid to private school if I had to.

-Can you give just one example of these super-secret "techniques" that public school kids are apparently not privy to?
-To each his own but you're nucking futz, bro.

 

[RU85inFla]

Both of my kids went to good public HS's. One was in the IB program which was great for him. Pushed the level of thinking real high which is good. The sillis he learned to comprehend have helped him tremendously in college and in his career. He has decided to become an actuary and has flown thru the first 5 tests without a hiccup. Yes he is a smart kid but it was his HS IB program that taught him how to absorb so much information.

My other son went into a biotech program that was run in part by the Mayo clinic. He likes science and enjoyed it but it was too much. Unfortunately it is topic specific but has to cater to all of the kids in the program - kids of all academic levels. Two years in and he had enough even though he is deep into science in college now.

My wife teaches at a private school. Great supporting parents, good kids and discipline are key to a learning environment. However almost all that can pay get in. The kids in that school on average do much better than any public school.

The short answer is that if your kid is real smart and motivated, get him into an IB like program that will push the hell out of him academically but realize that if he truly can't keep up it will suck. If you kid has a real interest in something like science, get him into a tech-program, but realize that if he is off the charts smart he might be in there with other kids that just like the same stuff he does but the pace will not be what he wants. If he is an average or below average student get him in a private school where the structure and discipline will help him out perform expectations. However if he is a b+ - a student that is highly motivated and social, the public HS will be fine.

 

[rutgersdave]

Having went to a private high school, I think they are all important. However, after seeing my niece and nephews go to an extraordinary private elementary school, I would probably go with that. These kids are way advanced, learning habits and techniques that will carry them through a lifetime.

High school was great, mostly for the friendships made and the kids I rubbed elbows with. I still see many to this day, and almost are highly, highly successful. Being around successful people is a major plus when I consider private schools.

I would mortgage my house to send my kid to private school if I had to.

I think I would agree that a private elementary school education would instill habits that would be with a you for a lifetime. It's difficult due to the cost k-8 grades. The friendships that you developed in high school with very motivated friends mades a different. However, this would apply with being with motivated friends in high school or college. I changed my habits in college since I was friends with the ones at the top of the class.

 

[Leonard23]

You all must be rolling in the cash if you're spending 5, 10, 15K a year extra for private schools. I tip my hat to you.

Your cost estimates are way off. Many of these top private schools cost as much or more than college. Pingry is $30k-$35k+/yr. Good private preschools with kindergarten are $15k-$18k+.

 

[REDRICH65]

I live in Delaware. If you get a job here, live in PA. I didn't listen and had to face forced bussing into Wilmington (Murder City in 2013) or private schools. Chose the latter and never regretted except still have a mortgage at age 72. Kids did well. 2 of 3 graduated UVA with 2 degrees. Now in 40's with great careers. Many Delaware PS are below national average.

 

[Underdogs88]

Why would private schools have higher quality staff? Teacher salaries in private schools in NJ are typically a fraction of what public school teachers make.

This is true. The pay is much higher in public schools. Most private school teachers are looking for public school jobs. This is one of the main reasons private schools have a higher % of novice teachers. Most of the top teachers will be found at the top public schools because of the pay and the medical benefits.

 

[RUfinal4]

Why would private schools have higher quality staff? Teacher salaries in private schools in NJ are typically a fraction of what public school teachers make.

I would like to see more information on this. I am guessing the catholic schools offer similar benefits as the publics (healthcare and pension) via the diocese since they have a large revenue source. With the unaffiliated privates are they paying experienced teachers 6 figures like the publics? Do they offer pensions and other benefits that attract the more experienced teachers?

I was a public school kid but have family in the outer bouroughs of NYC that send kids to private school. In NYC they feel it is important because your kids could end up in different high schools based on placement tests. Also, there is a higher chance of them being in classes with kids from different social economic backgrounds and possible bad apples. In the prvate school they are learning 3 languages while in elementary school, have classmates whose parents are all ambitious in the business world, and have teachers that are very active with regular updates to parents via email on the kid's progress. While they were in public school before the private the teachers were not as willing to provide regular updates after school hours and were not big on email.

 

[Scarlet_Scourge]

I recommend advance and honors math for kids who love science, since that is the biggest hurdle as to whether they want to be a scientist and get a PHd in college or just learn about nature.

Learning about science is a ton of fun but doing science is impossible without strong math skills.

Math education in the US is really weak compared to most countries. So parents really need to supplement this with after school problems and summer school and making sure their kids are place in the most advance classes (normal classes in other countries).

 

[Caliknight]

-Can you give just one example of these super-secret "techniques" that public school kids are apparently not privy to?
-To each his own but you're nucking futz, bro.

I'm not in the school and never used the word "secret". I can tell you there is a heavy emphasis on math, reading and writing. Whatever they do, these kids I meet from there seem to be very curious and like learning. I just find them much more educated then other kids I run into their same age. The people my age I know who went to the school have always seemed very well educated to me as well. The ones I have spoken to chalk it up to their grade school.

You may not like it, you may think it is "nuts", but that doesn't make it so.