OT: A little sports levity

[RUPsyched]

My son umpires for Perfect Game. This last few weeks have been brutal as the temps reached triple digits and G-d only knows what the wet bulb would have read. After getting sunburned the previous few days, my son wore a light weight long sleeved shirt under his uniform. The following is a dialogue from one of the games:

My son walks over to the fence to get some water.

A Mom in attendance: "Hey Blue, aren't you broiling wearing that long sleeve!? Holy Cow I'm hot for you!"

The husband: "I'm sitting right here hon."

Everyone knew what the mom meant, but the double entendre was too funny to resist laughing.

BTW, if you can take the heat(temp) and the heat(coaches, parents), umps make some good money.

 

[JDNB]

I got one, a few years ago, I was at my grandson’s high school baseball games, when a woman came up behind me, and kissed me on the cheek. She went on to explain, that she thought I was her father. We both got a laugh out of it.

 

[hankee18]

A friend was eating a business lunch one time with a customer. Customer was a big 6-4 athletic guy.

Young kid from across the restaurant comes up wants an autograph. Guy rebuffs him and tries to explain he's not who he thinks he is but not before the Karen mom came over ranting "you athletes are all jerks can't even make a kids day by signing an autograph..."

 

[mdk01]

A friend was eating a business lunch one time with a customer. Customer was a big 6-4 athletic guy.

Young kid from across the restaurant comes up wants an autograph. Guy rebuffs him and tries to explain he's not who he thinks he is but not before the Karen mom came over ranting "you athletes are all jerks can't even make a kids day by signing an autograph..."

Perfect response would have been saying "OK", signing it and then letting them figure out who the hell's autograph they got.

 

[JDNB]

I was eating a meal at a bar in a restaurant, and sitting next to me was a younger woman. We exchange a little small talk before she left. When it came to pay my bill, the bartender informed me that the lady had paid for my dinner, because I reminded her of her father.
For Hillsborough area residents, it was at Pizza & Pasta.

 

[JERZEE73]

I was umpiring a girls softball game and walking from the parking lot to the field wearing all my gear on an
extremely hot day, when 1 of the Moms commented that I llooked hot. I simply replied “Thank you very much”.
She laughed when she realized what she had actually said. BTW, 1 of the benefits of officiating youth or high school sports
is some of the Moms can be nice eye candy. Not sure if they’re all from the Hillsborough Deli.

 

[Knight Shift]

Not sports, but a funny moment in the boring world of court rooms:

 

[WhichReligionIsRight]

 

[RUBubba]

Ha! Years ago a female friend of mine was friends with a guy that pitched for the Royals. He was pitching against the Yankees and left her tickets. After the game we waited for him and walked out through the players entrance. Fans recognized him as the starting pitcher and asked for his autograph. They saw me, and we were the same age, roughly the same size so they started asking me for my autograph… so I started signing. I heard one kid turn to his dad asking who I was, and I heard dad say, “I don’t know… must have just been called up from AAA.”

 

[hankee18]

I had a buddy I used to work with looked just like Tiki Barber.

One time I'm eating lunch at the airport with some other coworkers and here comes my buddy strolling through to another gate. We all start yelling yo Tiki! and he comes over laughing and sits down to eat with us

Well a lady at the bar notices, keeps looking over. About 5 min later she comes up notebook in hand 'Im sorry to bother you Mr Barber but I'm a huge football fan, my husband and I go to Rams training camp every year can I have an autograph?"

My buddy looks at me coy and then we're all just like naaaah we can't do it to her and kindly explain the joke