Exactly
One can live on a cul de sac and not be in a bubble.
For example, living in a diverse suburban town in central NJ and enjoying the various cultural events, unique food options, and expanded shopping.
Someone can live on a cul de sac in Mahwah and grab bulgogi in Fort Lee and stop at the Russian banya in Fair Lawn. They can live in Edison and go to dim sum and pick up supplies on Oak Tree Road.
Or they can live in on a suburban cul de sac a few miles from where they grow up, live at home while attending RU on a free ride courtesy of their parents' union, and never develop any meaningful relationships outside of those spent in hours a day on a message board under different handle promoting political views long rejected.
The difference is so easy to spot as you correctly point out.
It is crazy- what I see when I or anyone in America talks about systematic or racism in any way- there is so much talk from people that should be helping but also have no right to argue it. My pre life, spent as a white male, suburbia, white wife and kids- I would have been in that group but also would have argued very strongly the following:
*Don't get in trouble with the law and you will have no trouble with the law
*If the police say hands up- just do it - you have nothing to fear if innocent
*I know a lot of minorities and friends with them and have no problem inviting anyone over to my house, out with my friends, etc
*Corporation no longer hire based on race but usually hire minorities over whites, not for their skills but for quota.
*My town went from 5% diversity to almost 12% - I have a black couple in my neighborhood and no one looks at them different.
And then, my household over the past 20 years has become majority black/Caribbean - and my world was rocked.
And I have 2 white boys and 2 black boys and the world is different for them.
My wife and I have the world treat us differently
Corporations- My wife is a Mortgage Loan "Advisor" in 10 states over a 29 year career. Presidents club in almost every one of them. Various companies and if they make "teams" she always finds that let's say they have 100 other in her position/title- her team will have the only other black female in that position on it. Her team will always be the most diversified, her team will never get the role of the A team.
In our towns and neighborhoods- our family used to be invited to everything in town and High School and everyone's party when our son was in the NFL.
After- we do get along with almost everyone and they will invite us over one on one and many of their parties. But we find there are parties we used to get invited to or parties where others that are not interracial but with same relationship are invited to...etc
Why, when we go to a car dealership or one of the highend flagship stores such as Nordstrum at the mall- we always happen to get the black sales person?
These are the things that those in the bubble do not see or feel and since they don't see it, it could not possibly be happening unless we have proof or numbers. I would have denied it previously myself and only now do I realize I would have done that out of defending myself not ever standing in the other person's shoes.
You will find outliners that will be in those shoes and disagree and you find those that understand what they do not experience themselves and try to do all they can to discuss and also help. But, you have the bubble- and so many of those people are good people with good intention but they do not understand what they do not experience.
It is sad...