3. Wonderful Christmastime - Paul McCartney.
"Hey Paul, a lot of stars have their own Christmas song, you should do one too."
"Okay mate, give me five minutes, I'll crap one right out."
2. Step Into Christmas - Elton John.
This song is horrible, complete with weird sound effects that, to me, sound a lot like a toilet flushing. It's the perfect complement to the McCartney song.
1. Last Christmas - Wham.
My wife and I argue about this one a lot. She loves it and plays it on a freaking loop. "Let's put on some Christmas music." Dammit... I can't stand it. Just because you say the word Christmas over and over again, it does not make it a Christmas song. Other than the fact that he calls the song Last Christmas, give me one thing about the song that inherently captures anything about Christmas. Better yet, substitute any other holiday - or calendar date for that matter - for the word Christmas. The song still reads exactly the same way and makes perfect sense. "Last May 3rd, I gave you my heart." or "Last Roshashana, I gave you my heart. But the very next day, you gave it away." Roshashana probably goes better with the beat of the song actually. NOT A CHRISTMAS SONG.
These songs need to go into a sound eliminating vault, together with the artists who created them, and forever locked away.