We started being home by ourselves in 2nd or 3rd grade
These days, I presume the kids are much older
OT: Parochial school, when is best time to start
- Thread starter jaydogsmooth1
- Start date
These days, I presume the kids are much older
The one we're looking at is around 8k for elementary
High school is around 15k
So it's a 75k proposition (present day - it'll surely rise in the coming years) for 7 years of catholic school
I think tapping the 529 for non public high schools is also an option, but I have to look into that further
Would rather hold off on that as long as we can
When to raid the 529 is another thread ! Put that with what age to take social security thread !
Yep, things likely won't get easier and some kids are very headstrong. I knew I was an atheist by the time I was 10-11 and fought going to church (Lutheran) every Sunday until my parents (divorced by then) made me a deal, saying I could decide if I wanted to keep going to church as long as I completed the confirmation process (at age 12). I thought that was fair, so that was our agreement and I actually enjoyed the weekly religious instruction and discussions/arguments with our pastor who was a very cool guy and I was confirmed and that was the last time I was ever in a church of my own volition.
I can't even imagine the fights we would've had if my folks hadn't relented (I think the fact that I got all A's helped - wasn't like I was a delinquent - at least not that they knew about, lol). Our son was raised without any formal religion, although we talked a lot about religion, philosophy and science and gave him plenty of books on those topics by the time he was 9-10, as he was a voracious reader. He knew we weren't religious, but we regularly offered to take him to any place of worship if that's what he wanted, but he never did, and he ended up as non-religious as we are. You might want to at least think about how you'd respond if your daughter either wanted to give up on religion or maybe simply wants to go to the local public school. It could happen. Good luck regardless.
I thought being an adult would be more fun than this!
Those are all solid points
I think the main thing in whatever parents decide is that it's ultimately their job to parent the chil
Meaning different things can certainly help and contribute to their upbringing and views on things (school, church, sports, friends, etc.) but it's ultimately up to the parents to instill certain traits, values, morals, virtures and hold the child accountable if they're not living up to their "end of the bargain"
Sorry, was looking up HS costs; presumably middle school is cheaper.
He said 8k. Probably more with fundraising and other fees. Then the family has to show they “belong” to a church in the dicocse or even the parish of the school . The church always gets theirs lol!
So your 15k isn’t that far off .
Why segregate your life? No religion in school, but religion afterwards and on the weekend? We are mediocre Catholics but completed the sacraments and value its basic teachings/culture.
Our school is an independent Catholic school (no diocese, similar to Delbarton) so it is prep first with religion on the side. We love the fact that we don't need to silo our lives. We celebrate all of our holidays in school or outside. And better yet, only half the students here are Catholic, so we get to celebrate everyone's holidays and religious culture.
You should add in what age you legendarily started taking Geritol and wearing Depends.
You just like it because they keep a lot of the riff raff out.
Control of the community and peer group is a big positive! :)
Listen I get it I am a public school teacher and believe that if people feel that strongly about the religious aspect of school then they should do it. I almost sent my son to private school. So I do get it
Not everything a legend does is legendary . This legend is limited to posts on this board
Your child is old enough now and you will know what is best for her. Others will recommend a school based on their own experience but may not be a good fit for your child. Do the due diligence and shop around. What’s good for one may not be for the other.
If you’re really looking for the religious experience you will only get that at a private religious school. As others have said Monmouth County is loaded with good schools. No private school in the county will compare to the county academies academically. There are also a number of public schools that will take students as “private” students.
Find what works best for your family. You will know it when you see it. You will know the time is right when you find what you’re looking for.
If you’re really looking for the religious experience you will only get that at a private religious school. As others have said Monmouth County is loaded with good schools. No private school in the county will compare to the county academies academically. There are also a number of public schools that will take students as “private” students.
Find what works best for your family. You will know it when you see it. You will know the time is right when you find what you’re looking for.
Last edited:
You’re not wrong on a general level if you’re considering all NJ public schools. OP mentioned he lives in Monmouth County. There is no private school in the area that is beating the county academies in this metric. None. And it’s not debatable. But there is no religious aspect there.
He mentioned being close enough to the Princeton area to consider those private schools.
Different situation here, but a little note in terms of timing. We moved across country and wouldn’t have done it if our daughter wasn’t 100% on board. She finished out 6th grade, graduating with all of her friends so it was a nice clean break since they were headed to a new school in 7th anyway . A few of her closer friends were going in different directions to private schools as well so that helped.
The OP says his prime concern is that his daughter receive a Catholic education. No amount of after-school or weekend instruction is going to provide that to anywhere near the same degree. (How do I know? I went to after-school Hebrew school and "Junior Congregation," and I didn't receive one-tenth of the instruction that kids do in Jewish day schools.) If my prime concern were religious education, I would put the child in a religious school as early as possible. But in considering the timing, the parent must think about the possible disruption to the child and risk of making her very unhappy.
I got the sense that he is in the Freehold/Colts Neck area along 537/Kozlowski Road vicinity. If I have that correct that is a tough commute to Princeton area for a kid.
To save $10-15K per year, which isn't trivial. Plus, going to a school that isn't in one's town (very likely) is far more "segregation in life" than being in public school in one's town and adding a bit of religious content/instruction on top of that. And I'm pretty sure the diversity of cultures/holidays in a public school exceeds that of most Catholic schools.
Definitely not. Public schools don't celebrate any religious holidays.
This is the funny aspect to me. There's probably a lot of places in NJ with lower taxes and cruddy public schools so you would save money. That or living in NYC - depending on how the city income tax could come into play- might make more sense.
Idk what town OP lives in, but Holmdel or Rumson-Fair Haven HS is almost certainly as well, and probably the bulk of Freehold Regional.
People move to that area for a reason. And it is absolutely not to send their kids to SJV, RBC or CBA.
If this is accurate, I would love to hear our private school advocates share the hard data showing which commutable private schools are superior to Colts Neck or Freehold Boro HS. Since it's so obvious should be easy, right?
Yep, we had to come in on Christmas and never ever got latkes around Hanukkah and on Good Friday they made us eat a steak sandwich.
SMH
My guess is that public school quality is not the only thing the OP considered in choosing where he and his family should live. So perhaps it makes sense for him to be living there even if he chooses not to use its public schools. I doubt he's the only person living in his area for reasons other than the schools.
I was quite similar though I fought Confirmation tooth and nail lol. I would offer my kids the same and studied religion in Western Civ and took classes on religion at RU and at law school as well.
Public schools offer a really wide breadth of education about religion. They just don't force it on you. When you force things on people, especially young people, they tend to push back. Which is why among other reasons so many Catholic schools are closing.
Maybe. But a home across the border in Middlesex County in Old Bridge or Ocean County would be a step into lower prices. Schools would be lesser but then that wouldn't figure into the calculus. And there's the same offering in home styles, lots of McMansions, bigger lots, suburban neighborhoods. The real walkable towns in Monmouth, Red Bank aside, have lesser schools as well.
I mean I thank people like that who use their high property taxes to fund my public education though it just strikes me as an odd financial choice.
I was talking about days off. Pretty sure Catholic schools aren't closing schools on Yom Kippur or Diwali...
That's true, but we moved here b/c we love this area (close to the beach, scenic, relaxing) and close to my wife's job as a teacher (I'm in sales so I can live and work wherever)
Then you live somewhere long enough and you become accustomed to it (house, neighbors, routine) and the thought of moving again, even if we saved some in taxes, isn't appealing
I had a friend who built a mansion in Colts Neck and sent his kids to CBA. I think it was mainly for sports, but one kid ended up being the valedictorian. Both have done well.
They are very nice kids.
We grew up in Readington
Moved from Scotch Plains when I was 7
My parents moved there b/c it was country and scenic
They didn't move away from SP b/c it was bad
If they could have afforded private / parchioal school, that's where they would have sent me (at least for high school), even though Readington had great public schools
Maybe not IHS, but St. Joes in Metchuen or Bishop Ahr would have likely been the choices if the $ was there (PDS, Delby etc. weren't their style so they woudnlt have given it much thought even if we had the $)
We're off 537 near Kozloski like Tom mentioned
Again, not an easy decision as we're both public school educated and one of the main reasons we choose this area was for the schools if we indeed were going to have kids
This is accurate, we moved here b/c we loved the area and the schools were good
Now that we've been here 12 years, it's home until we retire down to Florida
Which, given how this winter has gone, needs to be sooner rather than later!
Good ole St. Joes. I grew up in East Brunswick and they were our biggest basketball rivals. I always played well in their gym. Got 34 points one game (I think my junior year).
There's no denying that
And if we were to move today, that might be the play
But we bought a dozen years ago, and the thought of moving again isn't appealing
Latest posts
-
-
-
-
Basketball Season Predictions for the 2024-25 Rutgers Basketball Season- Latest: Craig Epstein
-