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Way OT: What to do with a dead hawk?

CranfordKnight

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Jun 23, 2006
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Figured it was worth asking since this board is usually great for suggestions.

I came home today to find a dead hawk in my driveway. Not sure how it got there, but it's in perfect condition, like it just dropped out of the sky. Animal control told me they would take it away for $150 or I could just shovel it up and throw it out. That doesn't seem right. Knowing that places like the Trailside Nature Center in Mountainside has a large collection of taxidermied animals that are mostly collected roadkill, I was thinking maybe I could donate it somewhere. I'm going to start by calling there in the morning.

Any other suggestions? Someone mentioned the Raptor Trust, but that seems more a rehab place, and this thing is definitely beyond help. It's sitting frozen in my garage, but won't last very long with the coming warmer weather.
 
Throw it in the backyard and let the crows have their revenge.

Yeah, my guess if I just left in out there, scavengers would take care of the issue for me. Frankly, I'm surprised the vultures in the park across the street from my house didn't find it before I did.
 
Put it in your trunk and drop it off at Monmouth University?
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Though I think they are primarily interested in injured/alive hawks/birds I'd seek advice from The Raptor TRUst in Basking Ridge. Else mount it for the next Iowa home game.
 
It looks like it, but the tail is not red, it's brown. I understand some don't have red tails, but I'm no expert.
It's a Cooper's hawk if it has a brown tail. Red tailed hawks for obvious reasons have a reddish tail. Cooper Hawks are quite common in this area and a pain in the ass for farmers. They're very aggressive, fearless and agile. They're smaller than Red Tailed. They fly right into our barn to get chickens. They'll even walk into bushes to get hiding chickens. Just dig a hole and bury it, they're not endangered or protected. Plenty of those suckers around.
 
You call these punchlines? Cranford offers up a comedic hangin' curve ball, and the best we have is "take it to Monmouth University"? C'mon man!
 
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Throw it in the backyard and let the crows have their revenge.

This. Can't tell you how many birds were killed by hawks near my backyard feeder. One time I'm on the deck and I hear this thud. Look over and see feathers floating in the air. Just dig a hole and bury it, OP
 
Stuffed hawks are going for $2-300 on eBay. The real money is in Big Horns though...
 
Though I think they are primarily interested in injured/alive hawks/birds I'd seek advice from The Raptor TRUst in Basking Ridge. Else mount it for the next Iowa home game.
You're assuming he's into bestial necrophilia?
 
I can call my uncle Vito, though he usually deals with dead wiseguys not hawks
 
It is not like it is a bald eagle, put it in its own black bag and curbside it so the normal thrash pick up will pick it up. Or give it a good Christian burial.

Whatever works for you.
 
"I'll tell you what's wrong with it, my lad. 'E's dead, that's what's wrong with it!"

"No, no, 'e's uh,...he's resting."

"Look, matey, I know a dead hawk when I see one, and I'm looking at one right now."

"No no he's not dead, he's, he's restin'! Remarkable bird, the brown tailed hawk, idn'it, ay? Beautiful plumage!"

"The plumage don't enter into it. It's stone dead."

"Nononono, no, no! 'E's resting!"

"All right then, if he's restin', I'll wake him up! (shouting at the cage) 'Ello, Mister Brownie Hawk! I've got a lovely fresh cuttle fish for you if you show... (owner hits the cage)

"There, he moved!"

"No, he didn't, that was you hitting the cage!"

"I never!!"

"Yes, you did!"
 
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Aside from the fact that is cooler than a squirrel in front of your house, manner of handling is no different. Rather than trashcan, out of respect for the animal, I would get a shovel.


Or I suppose .. seeing as you are right on the river....you could build a miniature boat out of sticks and do the whole viking thing. It would be pretty small though. How good are you with a bow?
 
Or I suppose .. seeing as you are right on the river....you could build a miniature boat out of sticks and do the whole viking thing. It would be pretty small though. How good are you with a bow?
Why are you worried about his fiddling skills?
That's the f*cker whose been disemboweling my chickens. You should be proud, you just killed a mass murderer. Today the world is a safer place in Chickenville due to your efforts. My entire flock commends you sir.
His offspring have read your comments and are planning their revenge.
Stuffed hawks are going for $2-300 on eBay,
I think the hawks were getting stuffed for much cheaper at koleszar's place!
 
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